I'm right.

Last night, after a couple of drinks with one of my Salt Lake City "friends", I went back to my van in an intense emotional state. And cried.

Because the man I was hanging out with told me that I was "annoying" and that he wouldn't want to hang out with me anymore if I didn't stop "giving him shit." When this topic first arose, I tried listening, clarifying, thinking... Surely this was a misunderstanding! Growing up with a bazillion siblings, I know that my humor often leans toward the "giving people shit" end of the spectrum, but I also know that this sort of humor can only be used on a certain type of victim: someone who can dish it out.

I'm proud of myself, because I stood my ground. I took my own side first instead of blindly believing what he said. But it's not often that people deal out feedback like his, so after I got to my van I had to contemplate it. Was I annoying? Did I say something that I shouldn't have? Do more people think this about me but never say anything?

In the end I still take my own side. The information he gave me was useful, but I'm going to stand by my behaviors because I know I'm a good person. If I made a mistake, it was in misreading his personality. While I'll consider what he said, I'm going to stay allied with myself, because I'm all I've got out here. If I don't support and stand by myself, who will? I can't let someone else's opinion of me determine how I feel about the sexy, fabulous, adventurous and brave Eva Darling.


My three biggest fans:

Me

Myself

I

Aggggggh. I notice that, on the road, I experience every emotion to the extreme. When I'm happy, I'm WOOOOOOOO HOOOOOO happy. When I'm sad, I'm in the pits of desperation. I could start my own X-games competition for X-treme emotional outpouring. I'd hold my own against menopausal women and schizophrenics. I could set records for manic moods...